Because Of Love

“Signore.”Upstodatee from Novel(D)ra/m/a.O(r)g

Rafe gave a small grunt of acknowledgement when Enzo called out to him, his mind focused on the paperwork in front of him. It had been a long time since he’d felt energized and not forced to work. He was going to capitalize on that before things went back to normal.

“You look different.”

That got his attention. With his brows pulled together, he looked up at Enzo where he stood across from him on the other side of the mahogany desk and asked, “What do you mean?”

Lips pulled, eyebrows raised, he answered, “Relaxed, rested… unlike your normal self.”

One side of Rafe’s lips rose in half a smile. He looked relaxed and rested? He sat still and thought on those words and, truly enough, he didn’t feel that ton of weight on his shoulders, his chest didn’t feel packed and congested and he didn’t have that headache that had become normal to him. He was lighter, freer and if he could dare to say, happy. He hadn’t felt happy for the hell of being happy in a very long time. That was something he never imagined he would ever be again.

So this is how it feels, he thought to himself, to be unburdened.

His responsibilities were still there but they didn’t feel like they had a choking hold on him like they used to.

Why was that?

Talia McKenna, that was why. He had been confused as to why she suggested watching a movie after he’d shown her the one thing he was ready to die before he did – vulnerability. He had expected… well he wasn’t sure what he had expected, but an invite to watch a movie wasn’t it. If he had been open with other people, including his own father, they would have used it against him, capitalized on it for their own benefit, but she’d suggested a shower, pizza and a movie. He looked to the corner of his desk where her proposal sat. There was still time for her to exploit it.

No, he thought, slowly shaking his head, that just isn’t her.

So who is she?

She’s the person who’d helped him sleep. The first to invite him to a movie, the first to pay for dinner even though it was just a pizza. He turned and looked at the couch with a small smile and a burst of emotion in his chest that made him feel elevated. She was the first to let him sleep comfortably on her lap no matter how uncomfortable it made her.

At some time in the early morning, he was pulled from sleep by the sound of a vacuum hoover. He woke up to find his head on her lap, when and how it got there he had no idea. What surprised him more was the sleep fog that filled his head and his body dragged, actually dragged lazily as he sat up. He watched her for an incoherent moment as she slept, her head lolled back, resting against the wall. It took a long moment for the thought ‘she must be uncomfortable’ to process in his mind. It took a lot of effort to shift her on the couch, as he fought off the drag of sleep to place her in a position where he could cuddle her and they could both sleep comfortably.

Well, somewhat comfortably, he thought as he stretched his stiff neck with a smile. Any other time, the slightest discomfort would have not only woken him but made it impossible for him to get back to his normal fitful sleep.

Sleeping with her in his arms worked better than any sedative he’d ever been prescribed.

Will you be working late again? he wondered, hoping he could get the same treatment that night as the night before.

He looked at the cellphone on his desk, Talia’s. Thanks to her alarm, he’d woken up just as Enzo had walked into his office. She hadn’t bothered to come pick it up yet. He hadn’t seen her the whole day and he questioned if she was avoiding him. But there were two things of hers he had, her phone and her proposal. Sooner or later, she would come to him and he would be waiting.

“Will you be working late again tonight, Signore?”

“Si. You can leave now if you like.”

He gave a single nod, said, “Buona giornata.” Then he turned to leave.

It was an hour or two later when the sun began to set that Talia finally knocked on his door. With havoc playing in his belly, he watched with a schooled face as she stepped into his office and walked straight to him with easy determined steps. She stopped at his desk, shoulders back, chin slightly raised, all business like. It was amusing how she was working so hard to keep it professional. It was good that she knew they were beyond that now. He still didn’t know what they were but they’d gone past a few gates and were heading to a destination that might keep their lives intertwined for a very long time. For a moment he wished the barrier that the desk presented standing between them would suddenly vanish. Itching to stand and quickly go to her, he leaned back into his chair and fisted his hands on the arm rests, holding himself back.

They stared at each other in heavy silence that made Rafe antsier for a long while before she finally spoke.

“You slept last night.”

Those words weren’t what he had expected to be the first thing out of her mouth. That made his heart skip a little. If he wasn’t mistaken, she cared about him. The fact that she stayed all night with him was confirmation enough.

He smiled openly and honestly, and returned, “Yes, I did.”

She returned the smile with a small nod and said, “So animated movies are like counting sheep to you.”

“No, a warm soft human pillow was what did the trick,” he said even more honestly. He recognized he was completely disarmed.

She settled him, he realized soberly. All the noise in his head went silent around her. That wired, restless feeling he always got that required him to keep moving or lose his mind disappeared when she looked at him with those illuminating eyes that just seemed so filled with life. A doctor would say she was just what he needed, so why couldn’t he keep her?

Gabriella? His father? He didn’t need to marry to take over the Rossi’s business. He would come up with a plan to accomplish that. It was what he was good at, why he was so successful. With that settled, it was decided he would keep her. He had to for his own sake. Selfish yes, but he never claimed to be a saint.

Was he really going to keep her? Yes, but for how long? For a day, a month, a year? No, longer.

He knew instantly as he stared at her smiling calm face that he would never be able to let go of her. He wanted all the time in the world with her. He wouldn’t be able to survive without her; she fixed him. She was a cure he’d been searching for, for years.

He didn’t love her, he admitted truthfully. He lusted for her that was for sure. For crying out loud her mere presence cured his limp dick. She was the kind of woman who deserved the moon and the stars, the kind of love that only existed in fairytales. But that wasn’t him, he was no Prince Charming. He was worse than Cassanova and had no business bringing her into his world, but damn he was going mad from wanting her and just imagining her with other men made his entire body shake with fury.

“Did you hear me?”

Her loud exclamation cut into his thoughts.

“What?”

“I said I can’t watch with you tonight. I have a date.”

His entire body went still with tension at the announcement. What was this? Was he psychic? As he felt the rage boil in his blood, he at least confirmed one thing. Whether or not she would ever be his, there was no way in hell she was going to belong to someone else.

“No, you don’t.” The rage simmering in his gut echoed in his voice and he didn’t care if she heard it or not.

Her eyebrows jumped up to her hairline. “Excuse me?”

He shot out of his chair and rounded the desk in three quick large steps until he was face to face with her. She gasped, startled, and took two quick short steps back. He reached for her before she could take another, his arm going around her waist. She gasped when he yanked her to him, slamming her against his chest.

“There is no way in hell I’m going to let you be with another man.” He gritted his clenched teeth.

He was sure he looked crazy, reconciled that he was acting irrational and out of place. It was none of his business what she did in her personal life but to hell with that. She needed to understand that her being with anyone else who wasn’t him was never going to happen. Not whilst he was still around, if ever.

“Excuse you!” Hands on his chest, she tried to push away and break free from him. He tightened his hold. “I don’t remember requiring your permission with what I do in my private life!” she yelled angrily.

He didn’t care. She could be pissed all she wanted but it would be a cold day in hell before he let her kiss another man, get touched by a man who wasn’t him, or worse… his jaw clenched so tight his back teeth hurt. Just the thought of her having sex with someone else drove him crazy with rage!