Dirty Little Secret (Forbidden Desires #1)

Biting my lower lip, I nodded.

Gavin turned to face me, taking my face in his hands. “No. I’m not. Are you?” His eyes met mine, and I could tell that my answer to this question mattered greatly to him.

“No.” It was the complete truth. There was no one else but him.

“Undress,” he demanded.

After a moment’s hesitation, I shed my blouse and pencil skirt. With a flick of his wrist, my bra came next.

My hands moved to the hips of my panties, and I moved to pull them down until Gavin stopped me.

“Leave the panties. I want to take those off myself.”

I paused, weighing his words.

“Good girl,” he said, taking my breasts into his hands and sending my heart spiraling.

Letting my eyes close briefly, I steeled myself and my strength for what was to come.Published by Nôv'elD/rama.Org.

Then his mouth crashed urgently against mine. Fiery sparks exploded beneath my closed eyes, and in that moment, I would have given him anything he asked for.

He kissed my lips, then trailed hot kisses down my neck while I rubbed my pelvis against his. His arousal felt so big and so hard, it could have been a baseball bat.

“Gavin . . .” The groan ripped from my throat as raw need raced through me. I clung to his powerful shoulders for support as the urgency of my need made me dizzy.

“Open my pants, Emma.”

I obeyed at once, pulling down the zipper to his gray trousers and letting the weight of his belt pull them to his knees.

“Touch me,” he commanded, his voice filled with more need than I’d ever heard before.

I brought my palm to his shaft and stroked the length of it, savoring the velvety feel of his hot skin.

“Use both hands.”

Fisting him in both hands, I pumped up and down more firmly this time.

“There,” he said, his voice controlled and measured. “Like that.”

He pushed my panties down my thighs, and they fell to my ankles.

While my hands continued to work his large shaft up and down, Gavin placed his index finger in my mouth. Once I had wet it with my tongue, sucking lightly, he brought his hand between my legs, rubbing my own saliva on the sensitive bundle of nerves with feather-light touches, teasing me until I was moaning and rocking my hips toward his hand.

As we remained rooted to the center of the bedroom, I couldn’t help but wonder if we’d lie together in his bed. Surely, he didn’t mean for us to have sex right here on the floor.

“On your knees, pet.”

Sinking to my knees on the plush carpeting before him, I waited, my eyes watching Gavin’s.

He pumped himself in long, lazy strokes, watching me with a dark, lust-filled gaze. Then he placed the broad head of his cock against my lips.

“Open for me.”

I obeyed. My mouth created a warm, wet suction over his flared head, and I could feel his eyes on me, watching, surveying my work.

Licking and sucking against him, my mouth made obscene noises, and occasionally I’d let out a little moan. Gavin stayed still and quiet. Ever controlled, ever calm.

Pleasuring him felt like a gift, a privilege. He’d made me work to earn his trust, always holding a part of himself back, and now, here in his bedroom, he was more mine than he’d ever been before.

Gavin’s large palms on either side of my face forced my mouth deeper onto his cock. “All of it.”

“So bossy,” I murmured around a mouthful of cock.

“You like it.”

He was right. It was almost as if I couldn’t become aroused without his barking commands. Poor Cooper never stood a chance. Dear God, why was I thinking about Cooper while Gavin’s cock was halfway down my throat? I was pretty sure I needed therapy. But then Gavin surged forward, pushing past my gag reflex, and all thoughts of the younger Kingsley were forgotten.

Forcing a breath through my nose, I relaxed my throat. I was aroused, slightly alarmed. And a whole lot turned on.

Gavin was so patient, too much so, while I felt ready to combust.

“Good girl,” he said. “Love the way you suck me off.”

Just when I began to wonder if this was the only thing on this evening’s agenda, Gavin pulled me to my feet, his hot erection pulsing between us.

“Turn around.” His voice was raw, urgent.

I faced the bed and Gavin pressed his chest against my back, the wall of firm muscle guiding me to the edge of the mattress where I bent forward, resting my upper body on the bed while he loomed over me.

I heard the tear of a condom packet and imagined him wrestling a condom onto that beast of a cock. No easy feat, to be sure.

A sharp smack sliced through the silence as his palm made contact with my ass.

Rather than flinch, my instinct was to moan and push back against him. Gone was the meek little librarian. Gavin made me wanton and reckless.

“Lift your ass for me, baby,” he growled.

Oh.

I arched my back, offering myself up to him, knowing his gaze caressed my private areas that were on display for him.

As demanding as he was, his cock was even more impatient, pushing forward and invading my body in a firm thrust. He continued inching forward, and I waited to feel him bottom out.

I gasped. “Jesus, Gavin. That all of it?”

“Just a little more. You’ll get used to it.”

I whimpered softly, my head moving from side to side as I gripped his duvet.

“It’s a blessing and a curse,” he said through gritted teeth, a hint of amusement in his voice.

It might have been our first time, but apparently, that didn’t mean Gavin was going to take it easy on me. The sex was rough, almost brutal, like he was working out his demons on me, like he had to erase all that vulnerability he’d shown.

Pressing hot kisses between my shoulder blades, Gavin hovered over me, his hips continuing to work their magic.

Though my head was spinning, processing, my body loved his total and complete domination.

“Should have pushed you from my mind after I first saw you. Fuck. You shouldn’t be here, pretty girl. Don’t deserve you.”

I wanted to tell him he was wrong, that he deserved love and admiration, but it was all I could do to hang on, grasping the bed as he pounded into me again and again.

My body clenched around him, and I came with a cry.

Gavin followed—gripping my ass in both palms as he let out a low grunt and emptied himself into the condom, his cock jerking inside me as my muscles continued to spasm.

When it was done, he leaned over me once more and pressed a soft kiss between my shoulder blades. “Stay put.”

Moments later, he was back with a warm cloth, wiping between my legs. The moment was so unexpected and tender. Tears stung my eyes as Gavin helped me to my feet, and we each dressed in silence.

A heaviness hung in the room around us that wasn’t there before, and I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.

I didn’t expect him to pull me into his arms for a cuddle session, necessarily, but he hadn’t even given me the privilege of laying me down on his bed, kissing or holding me while made love. He’d just bent me over the edge of it and had his way with me. But before I had time to fully process that, Gavin led me toward the hall.

“My driver will take you home now.”

I paused, balling my fists at my sides. “That’s it? After everything we shared today?”

“I don’t know what to tell you. This is who I am, Emma.”

“But you took me to see where you grew up, the restaurant . . . the intimacy tonight. I thought things between us were turning into something real.”

Gavin’s reserved demeanor was back, his gaze icy and cold. “This isn’t one of your storybooks. I never promised you a happy ending.”

As we stood beside the front door, I put on my shoes and grabbed my purse. “Cooper never made me feel like this.” I hurled the insult at Gavin with all the force I could muster, hoping since nothing else seemed to matter, the one thing that might would be his own sense of pride.

A flash of jealousy broke through his steely gaze before he blinked, and then it was gone in a flash. “Then maybe you should go and spend more time with him.”

With tears stinging my eyes, I fled, stabbing the button for the elevator.

“Ben will meet you downstairs,” Gavin said just as the elevator doors slid closed.

As if I needed one more reason to stay away from him, his cold and callous behavior tonight had sealed the deal.

Despite what he’d said, he had let me in today—however briefly. And it was magical. What else did I want? A relationship? Marriage? I almost choked on the word. Men like Gavin didn’t tie themselves down to one woman for all of eternity.

He was arrogant, cold, and incredibly frustrating. The way his powerful body moved, the way my skin heated when I was near him, I craved all of it. I wished I didn’t, wished desperately that I was stronger. But Gavin Kingsley had a hold over me unlike any I’d ever experienced.

Which was exactly why I needed to get out now—while I still could.

Ben opened the car door, and I slid inside just as a broken sob slipped from my throat.