Ex-Husband's Regret

Her life line Rowan

Fuck run my hand through my hair as I watch her sleep. Tears tracks were still visible on her

cheeks and it breaks me seeing her so broken.

Ava has always been fucking good at hiding her feelings. Today she didn’t and it was fucking raw

It was drowning her and without even her realizing it, she was drowning me along with her.

I take a seat near her sleeping form. I push my fingers through her hair as I massage her scalp

gently. How the fuck have I never realized how soft and thick her hair is? It was bliss just

touching it.

She sighs in her sleep in contentment. Her face relaxed. All the pain from earlier melted away. In

her sleep, she’s at a peace. She doesn’t have shadows accosting her.

I know it’s fucking creepy, but watching her sleep has become my favorite thing. I did the same

thing yesterday and here I am doing it today. She’s so beautiful it hurts. Even with dark under

eyes, she’s still stunning. I don’t know the fuck I ever thought she couldn’t compare to Emma.

I softly kiss her cheeks before standing up. I am reluctant to leave. I fight the part of me that

wants to pull the covers and slide in next to her. I don’t know where this need is coming from. It

was never there when we were married. Back then, I didn’t want her next to me. I always avoided

cuddling. Right now though, it’s all I can fucking think of.

I force myself to leave her room and walk out of her house. Taking a breath, I contemplate going

back, but I don’t. I know she won’t appreciate me being in bed with her. She might have accepted

my comfort, but that doesn’t mean she’s forgiven me for my part in hurting her.

I haven’t even asked for her forgiveness for heaven’s sake. I should and I will. I just need her to be

more stable when I do. 2

I take out my phone and call my twin. He picks up on the first ring.

“Meet me at the club” I tell him before hanging up.

I don’t have to wait for his reply. I just know that he will be there.

I give Ava’s house one last look before I jump into my car and drive away. About half an hour later,

I’m at one of my clubs. I enter through the VIP entrance that’s only meant for me, Gabe and any of

“Sir” the bouncer greets I nod at him then enter the club.

The damn music was loud and it was giving me a headache. Moving fast as the bouncer parts the

way for ane, we get to my private booth where things are much quieter.

He proceeds to stand guard at the entrance. It’s not once or twice that women tried gate crashing

just to get free drinks.

My personal bartender walks in with my drink and hands it to me. I don’t have to tell him what I

take, he already knows. Just like he knows what Gabe and Travis take.

“What’s got you in such foul mood?” Gabe asks walking in.

He’s younger than me by three minutes. While he’s the outgoing and social one. I’m the brooding

antisocial twin.

“Nothing” I mumble leaning back in my chair.

I still can’t get the fucking image of Ava on the cliff. The way she was so close to the edge. It all

but killed me when she took a hesitant step forward. The fear that had encased me was like

nothing like I’ve ever felt. It was tangible and it suffocated me

My heart honestly stopped and I saw my fucking life flash before my eyes. She was so broken and

I wanted nothing more than to piece her back together.

I don’t know what I would have done if I had been late. I don’t know why, but I know that if she had

died then my heart would have died with her. 1

“You forget I know you better than you know yourself brother” he takes a seat opposite me.

“Ava” her name slips out of my mouth in an anguished tone.

“You care about her”

“Of course I fucking care about her. She’s the mother of my son” I snap at him, frustrated.

The whole thing was frustrating me. She was spiraling out of control and I just didn’t know how to

help her. I didn’t know how to be what she needs. I’ve spent so much time pushing her away, that

I don’t know what makes her tick.

“It’s more than that big brother, you just refuse to open your fucking eyes and see it” he drawls.

He’s been on and on about that one issue. That my concern for Ava stem from feelings that ran

much deeper We keep arguing about that. I think I would fucking know if I was in love with her. I

care about her, and I have feelings I can’t describe, but love? I don’t think so.

“How’s the doing?” he asks when I don’t say anything else.

“She’s pregnant

He stares and me with wide eyes and an open jaw. “With Ethan’s baby?”

“Who else would she pregnant for?” I ask him in irritation.

When I found out yesterday, something just shifted inside me. Knowing she was expectant with that bastard’s baby just made everything more real. I had been blocking the knowledge that she had slept

with Ethan out.

When I found out, there was this primal part of me that wanted to kill Ethan for touching what’s mine. After that I blocked it out. Tried pretending that it didn’t happen because that’s the only

way I could calm myself down. Her pregnancy now was proof that she did sleep with another man

and for some reason it fucking hurts and drives me insane knowing that. 7

It’s completely unreasonable. I wanted her to move on. I wanted her to leave me alone. I was planning to woe Emma and marry her later on. Yet now that I know that Ava had moved on. Moved

on to the point she felt comfortable enough to let another man touch. I feel like a fucking piece of

me died. I can’t explain it and I don’t know why, but I feel lost. 3

“So what is she going to do?” he pulls me back to the present with his question.

“I don’t know” I whisper, staring at the amber liquid in my glass.

I debate telling him what happened at the cliff, but I stop myself. She has been through too much

already, I wasn’t going to tell my brother what she tried doing in her darkest moment. She

deserved to be protected and that was what I was going to do.

“Sir, this came in for you” Mike, my bartender hands me a small envelope.

He leaves immediately after.

“What is it?” Gabe asks curiously, moving to the edge of his seat.

“I don’t know” I tell him as I open it.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

A piece of paper falls out. I unfold it and read it.

(I’m not one to go after kids, so you can rest assured that I won’t go after your son I can’t say the same for the rest of your loved ones though I’m coming for you Rowan and everyone you hold dear]

It was signed in the Reapers insignia.

I should fear, but I don’t. All that registers is that they won’t go after Noah. That’s all that matters

to me right now.

I never want to feel the fear I felt when I saw her on that cliff. It was time for Noah to come home.

He has always been Ava life line, and now more than ever she needs him.