Chapter 47
"No, no." I tried to deny the fact that I was hungry. "I just came out for something."
"You mean that?" He pointed to a takeout bag on the dining table.
I rubbed my nose awkwardly after he had seen through my lie. "Didn't I tell the delivery guy not to ring the doorbell?"
"He didn't."
"Then how did
you know?"
"He knocked."
I choked, feeling embarrassed at the delivery guy's cleverness.
Walking over to open the bag, Ryan placed a bowl of steaming seafood soup in front of me. Grandpa said you didn't eat much at the banquet tonight, so he had the leftover seafood sent
over."
"So this soup..."
"I made it." Ryan sat across from me, his handsome face serious yet calm. "I took a shower first. Since you're not feeling well, try to avoid takeout for a while."
I paused, realizing his gesture was telling me something. He was telling me that he had made the soup after having a shower. This meant that he made sure the soup was clean in order to make me feel comfortable.
Lowering my head, I let the warmth of the soup fog my vision as I took a few bites. I was only able to calm myself down a while later.
"Ryan, you don't have to do this," I finally said.
'You're now making me hesitant. I hate it when people are hesitant and I don't want to become the kind of person that I hate,' I thought. Suddenly, a hand reached out, pushing my hair behind my ear. His cool fingertips grazed my earlobe.
"Isn't it normal for spouses to take care of each other?" he asked softly. "Have some more."
For a moment, I felt like we were back in the old days.
He was still a gentle and considerate husband.
When I looked up, I met his clear and penetrating dark eyes. "But only promised Grandpa to postpone the divorce for a month."
"Then for this month..." His eyes darkened. "Let me take care of you as a husband should. In
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the past, you've taken care of me and Grandpa. This month, it's my turn."
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A mixture of feelings arose in my heart, but I pretended to be indifferent. I didn't know whether to accept his kindness or not. I felt sorry for both him and myself. Reason was preventing me from giving in, but I still found it hard to refuse the warmth that I had longed for.
Ryan hesitated before speaking again, his voice slightly hoarse as if he had a sore throat.
"I've never believed we've reached the point where divorce is inevitable, nor have I agreed to the divorce."
I tightened my grip on the spoon, my fingertips turning white. When I looked up at him, I struggled to remain calm.
"Our marriage has been a secret from the day we got married. Yet your first love can be with you at all times and you would disappear as soon as she calls you. What does that make me? Am I an embarrassment to you? Well, you can say such a thing because you were never the one who suffered in this marriage."
Even though I tried to control myself, I still began sobbing in the end.
He looked briefly surprised, then fell silent. "Charlotte..."
"Well, there's nothing more to say between us."
After finishing the soup in a hurry, I fled.
Back in the bedroom, my heart kept on racing. Just as I was about to fall asleep, the thought of him being just a wall away disturbed me again.
I couldn't cut ties with him and my mind was a mess.
This was probably what being in chaos felt like.
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