Hatred With Benefits

S E V E N T Y - F O U R

EVA.

"We got groceries yesterday, and you still want ice cream?" Emerson asks as he stops the car and I

nod, "Ice cream is the better choice, Ford. "

"I can't believe I'm letting you do this. " He sighs as he unfastens his seatbelt and I beam at him, "You

love me. "

"Damn right I do. " He winks, closing the distance between us to place a kiss on my cheek before he

withdraws and says, "I'll be back. " I hum and watch as he takes his wallet from the car compartment

before he climbs out while I grab my phone from the side, only for it to vibrate the second it's in my

hand.

I slide the button to receive before I press it against my ear, "Mom?"

"Eva. " Her voice comes through. "How are you, baby?"

"I'm fine. How are you?" I say and there's a sigh from her end. "You know how things are before you

left. Your father wants you to come home. "

"Why? So he can get me away from Emerson? I already told you, mom. I'm not leaving him. I took the

risk of letting him know about my relationship and I will not let him take this away from me. " I tell her

and there's another sigh. "It's not that, baby. You have to understand that—"

"I've tried. I've tried to understand both of you, and I've failed. I'm sorry but I'm not coming home. "

"Eva, please. Don't make this harder than it already is. You know what Matt is capable of. Don't make

him come onto you, baby. " She says and I respond with, "I don't care. I've let him control me for a long

time, mom and I've always done things the way he wants, but not this time. I refuse to listen to him, this

time. I don't care what he does. "

"Eva, if your father comes there—" she starts, but I don't let her finish. "If he comes here, he'll have to

be willing to hurt me before he's able to achieve what he wants. "

"And is this boy worth it? Is he worth what you're doing for him? Is he worth turning you against your

father?" The question comes unexpected and I take a while to answer, but when I open my mouth, I

know the words I let out are nothing but the truth. "He is, and he's worth a lot more. "

"Eva—" she calls again and I say, "I've made my decision, mom. I'm not leaving him. Nothing you say

will change my mind. "

"And what about him? Is he willing to stay with you despite his father's will? Will he turn his back on his

father for you?"

"He wouldn't be here if he didn't. " I answer and there's a long silence from her side that I almost

thought she disconnected the line until her voice comes through again, "You both are young and I know

you love him, but don't let that love make you do things you'll come to regret. You know how much you

mean to us. "

"If I honestly do mean as much as you've always told me, then you'll understand me and give me your

support in this, not the other way around. I'm not the one turning my back on you, you're the one

turning your backs on your daughter. " I clarify and she makes a sound of disapproval, "We're only

watching out for you, Eva. Mason Ford isn't—"

"I'm done having this conversation with you, mom. " I say and there's another sigh from her. "Are you

happy? Are you honestly happy with him?"

"I am. " I reply and she hums, "That's all I need to hear. "

She stays on the line for a bit more, asking about my health and troubles, but not without drifting to the

issues I have with my father before she gets off the line, and my chest falls as I leave the phone

between my thighs.

"It was a long line. " I turn my head at the sound of Emerson and he settles in his seat before extending

the cups to me, stopping midway at the sight of me. "Did something happen?"

I take the cup from him, letting him have the other. "Why did you ask?"

"You are frowning, babe. " He answers as he closes the door and turns his body towards me, leaving

the cup between us. "What happened?"

"Mom called, and she wants me to come back home. She said something about dad coming to our

place if I refuse and that kind of pissed me off. I'm not a damn toy they can throw around. I've given

them their chance and they threw it away. " I hiss and Emerson holds his hand over mine, "Babe, are

you sure this is okay?"

"What?" I ask and he says, "This thing with your family. I don't want to be the reason you have trouble

with your parents. "

"You're having troubles with your father because of me. " I remind him and he chuckles, "That's

different, baby. Mason and I have always had troubles. This is you and your parents. You've always

been close; don't let me take that away from you, Eva. "

I lift my shoulder in a shrug. "They'll come around, and if they don't, then so be it. "

"Eva—" he tries calling again but I cut in. "I told you, Em. I'm not giving this up. "

He smiles and strokes my cheeks before he leans forward and takes my lips in his. I hold the cup with

one hand while the other hand slides to his neck and I caress the ends of his curls as I slide my tongue

inside his mouth, and lower his with mine.

When I start to move out of the seat, Emerson pulls back with furrowed brows, "What do you think

you're doing?"

I try to connect our lips again, but he ducks his head and I let out a groan of frustration, "I want you. "

"Right now?" He asks with wide eyes as he looks around us and I nod, "Yes, right now. "

"Eva, we're in the middle of the street. " He states the obvious and I say, "I don't care. " I push my head

closer and try to capture his lips, but once again— Emerson pulls back.

"Emerson!" I whine and he laughs. "I'm not fucking you in the middle of a street, baby. "

"But why? I want you right now. " I say and he looks around again before his gaze settles on mine. "We

could get caught. "

"And? It's not like we're doing anything bad, plus I don't see anyone passing through here. " I tell him

as I look outside the car and Emerson shakes his head when I look back at him, "It's public, Carson. "

"Since when do you care about where you touch me?" I narrow my eyes at him and he responds with,

"Since when do you not care about where I fuck you? Who the hell are you, and what have you done

with my baby?"

"Shut up. " I tell him with a frown and he laughs, stroking my cheek again. "Another time?"

"No, I want it right now. " I say, holding my hands over his and guiding it to the front of my pants. "I'm

soaked. "

"How can you be wet when you were pissed off about a minute ago?" He raises a brow as he

continues to rub me through my pants and I say, "You kissed me a second ago. What were you

expecting with your lips on mine?"

"Okay. I'll kiss you some more. " He mutters as he takes his hand away and gestures for me to move

onto his lap. I drop my cup beside his and almost knock them over with my leg as I slide on Emerson's

lap and his hands immediately move around me.

"Comfortable?" He questions and I say, "A bit more. "

Emerson presses the button, inclining the seat a bit more and I give a sound of approval before I grab

onto the front of his shirt and mash my lips against his. He clasps his hand around my head as he lets

me lead the kiss, and I let out a moan, my bottom lip dropping from his as I slowly start to rock against

the front of his pants. Moving my hands to his neck, I angle my head to the side and swipe my tongue

across his ear before I whisper, "You're hard. "

"You made me hard, baby. " He grunts in response and the movement of my hips start to still.

"How can I stay away when we're like this?" My head drops on his shoulder, letting it stay there for a

while with minor movements of my hips and when there's nothing but the heavy breathing of Emerson

mixed with mine, I pull back to meet his gaze and I'm taken aback by the tears in his eyes.

"What's wrong?" I ask him with a lifted brow, the mood immediately changing and he shakes his head,

"Nothing, baby. Everything is fine. "

"You're looking at me with tears in your eyes, Emerson. You can't fucking tell me that crap. What's it?" I

snap, my voice is loud as I wait for his response and he drops his gaze from mine, grabbing my hands

to lace his fingers through mine. When he meets my eyes again, he says, "You're just really beautiful. "

"Emerson, please—" I plead, my voice coming out smaller. "Don't make me do this again. Don't make

me have to fight before you tell me what's truly going on with you. "

He lifts his hand to cup my cheek. "You won't. I won't let that happen again. "

"Then tell me what's wrong with you. What's with the tears? Is it your brother? What did you discuss

with him?" I ask him and he drops his hand to cover my hand with both of his. He lifts it to his lips and

places a kiss on the tips of my fingers. He smiles up at me and says, "You trust me, don't you?"

I stare at him for a while before I give a small nod and he says, "With your words, baby. Tell me, do you

trust me, Carson? "

"I do trust you, but I don't like it when you're being this way either. " I tell him and he smiles at me, "If

you trust me then you'll have to believe me when I say everything is fine. "

"Emerson. " I call his name and he presses his lips to my hand. "Yes, my baby?"

There's a sudden dryness in my throat and I choke on my own words as I look into his eyes and say, "I

love you. "

His hand on mine freezes for a second and he covers his expression with a small smile before I can

read him. "I love you. " He whispers, using my hands to drag me closer till my head falls against his

chest, and his hands glide to my waist, patting my back gently and I should know right there that

something bad is coming. I can feel it. It's in the air between the two of us, and it's in me, but as I lay

there, listening to the loud beats of his heart; I wonder how bad it would be to trust him to be here

always. To trust him when he says I have nothing to be worried about.

At the sound of the vibration of my phone, I pull away from him and grab the mobile from the other seat

to see Aliya's name on the screen.

"Aliya is calling. I need to get to her place for the project. " I inform Emerson as I start to move off his

lap back to my seat, and when I attempt to get out of the car, he holds my hand and motions to my cup.

"Right, my ice cream. " I smile at him as I grab the cup before I turn to get off. When I shut the car door,

I peek through the window and say, "I'll see you at home in a few hours. "

"You will. " He responds and I wave at him before I withdraw my head, and walk in the other direction.

~

"I thought you'd be home first. " I mumble under my breath when I reach the front of our apartment with

the absence of Emerson's car. My shoulders sink in a sigh and I avert my gaze to the door as I stroll

inside the house and glance around the living room once, a sudden breeze making me rub my

shoulders before I turn in the direction of the bedrooms.

I walk inside Emerson's room and throw my bag to the side, about to walk to the bathroom when my

eyes catch the sight of a small piece of paper lying in the middle of the bed with a book holding it down.

I furrow my brows in confusion as I stride towards the bed and I move the book to grab the paper

beneath.

I instantly recognize the handwriting as Emerson's and I let out a chuckle. "You could have just texted

me. Trying to be creative, Ford?" NôvelDrama.Org holds text © rights.

But he wasn't. And I know that the second my eyes run across the first words, my smile dropping from

my face.

'Eva. Firstly, I want you to know that I didn't want to do this. I truly didn't want to do to us, baby. Not to

you, but I had no other choice—'

I don't read further than that before I throw the paper to the side, knowing the words that'll follow those

and move away from the bed, tears burning my eyes and at first they don't fall because a part of me

knew something bad was coming, but nothing— nothing could have ever prepared me for Emerson

Ford walking out of my life, and that's all it takes for my tears to stream down my cheeks.

"No. No, you didn't. You didn't do this to me, Ford. You—" my breathing gets heavier and I take my

trembling hands to the back of my pocket to take out my phone. My tears burn my vision and they

cover the screen of my phone, my fingers slipping as I tap on his name. It goes directly to voicemail

and I shake my head as I try again, getting the same response before I fall to the floor with an aching

heart in my hold.

"No, you didn't. You didn't leave. You didn't– you couldn't have. You won't. Yes, I just need to– I just

need to– No, please. Please don't do this to me. Please. Why? Why, Emerson? Why?" His smiles. The

tears. His chants of reassurance. Everything... He was leaving. He was leaving me, and I saw it coming

yet I choose to ignore it.

He was leaving me, and I— No. He can't do this to me. He knows how much I need him by my side. He

knows how much I've grown so used to having him here, he can't— he just can't.

My hands reaches to my head and I grip onto the locks as I let out a scream, my chest panting in sobs

with my heart pounding inside. Shaking and hurting. It hurts so fucking much. It just... Hurts.

After minutes of staying on the floor, I grab my phone and place another call to the only person I can

trust to save me from doing something terrible at this moment.

The line rings thrice before Aliya's voice comes in. "Babe?"

"Lia—" I call out her name, followed by a hiccup as I rub my chest and her voice is full of concern when

I hear it again. "Eva? What's wrong? Why did you sound like that?"

"I– I need you, please. I– I don't trust myself in this state. Just, please... Come. "

"Fuck, Eva. Tell me what happened. Hang on. Don't be anything stupid, I'm on my way. " I don't say

anything in response before I throw the phone to a corner and pull my knees to my chest, sweats

covering my trembling body as I plop my head against my knees. He left. Despite the promises, he left.

Why? Why did he leave me? Why now? Why when I've been utterly consumed by him? Why when I

was willing to do anything and everything to be with him?

My tears don't stop and my head starts to pound, voices echoing through my mind and darkness

kicking in as I wrap my arms around my body.

"Eva! Eva?" There are sudden shouts of my name, belonging to a familiar voice and I want to move,

but my body remains still and I can only mumble a name with a weak voice, "Lia. "

"Eva, please answer me! Where are you? Oh, God. " Her voice is getting closer, nearer, echoing

around me, filling the air and then she's here. She's standing in front of me with only steps away.

Aliya's eyes are wide as they meet mine and she stares down at me before she meets my eyes again

and she's rushing toward me.

"Eva. Oh my God, Evie. Are you okay?" She grabs onto my shoulder as she kneels by my side and I

shake my head, my chest rising as I struggle to let out words.

"Eva. " She calls again and I grab onto her hands to calm my trembling self. "Eva, please talk to me.

What happened? Why are you here? Where's Emerson?"

At the sound of his name, it gets heavier to breathe and I open my mouth to speak, but end up with

sobs, my entire body aching with pain. An unbearable pain that gets too hard to hold. It hurts

everywhere. From my head to the tip of my toes and to my heart that holds only him.

"Eva, please. " Aliya holds my face before she brings me into her arms and I grab onto her side tightly

as my head falls against her shoulder, my wet cheeks soaking her top. "Calm down. Breathe, Eva.

Please. " She says softly as her hand glides down my back and my grip on her gets tighter as my sobs

get heavier. "He— he left, Lia. He left... For good. "

"Eva. " She calls and I shut my eyes as I hold onto her for dear life, my voice muffled against her as I

speak again. "Emerson left. He left me. "

He really did. Despite everything, he chose to leave. He chose to throw away everything we have. I

gave everything for Emerson Ford and he gave pain in return; what a truly fucked up way of showing

gratitude.