Stillborn
“I don’t understand,” I whisper, my voice barely audible amidst the weighty silence that hangs in the air.
Mother speaks, words laced with severity. “Upon Hekate’s death, the Goddess expressed her wrath, and to the utmost surprise of our predecessors, she did not take our side.” Wrapping my hair in a towel, she says behind me in a commanding tone, “Rise.”
I stretch to my full length and step out of the cauldron. I grab a towel from the hanger and drape it around myself. “So… she brought him back? Don’t they say the Goddess forbids manipulating the states between life and death?”
Inching out the door, my mother throws over her shoulder, “She was angry enough to keep his soul from crossing into the ether, seeing as he’d cursed every generation yet to be born, condemning all but the humans to death. It didn’t make it any better that the curse had taken on a form of its own.”
Observing her as she raises a diaphanous blue gown and a red garment so deep it verges on ebony, I choose the scarlet attire.
Her eyebrows arch in inquiry, and I respond with a casual shrug. Why wear bright colours when the day is anything but? “The Goddess didn’t create the Void?”
“No,” Mother says as she urges me into a chair . I have no idea why she’s chosen to dress me up herself today. Any maid could do the job. She swiftly adds, ” I hear Theron Frostclaw will be in attendance. He is an eligible male from a good–”
“Don’t change the topic, mom.”Original content from NôvelDrama.Org.
“Hekate’s pain and grief gave the curse life, and it took on a form. An entity that had only one aim in mind. Destruction. The Goddess thought of it as a fitting punishment for what we had done and it wasn’t until the first generation of children began to die, that we pleaded for a way out.
“She had Hekate bound to his own curse, keeping his alive for as long as the Void was. However, that was only half of it. The other half contained the solution. The other half of the solution as dictated by the Goddess would be getting Hekate to forgive us and take back his curse.”
I scoff. “I don’t see how. Getting a dead man’s forgiveness–”
Mother cuts in with a click of her tongue. She hates being interrupted as much as she hates portals. “Binding Hekate to his own curse was only the first part. The second part came several years later. Twenty seven years ago, when she gave him life.”
The fabric sighs against my skin as I slip into it and my mother hums in approval, pleased with my choice. She pulls the lacing behind me and I watch as it tightens around my chest, enhancing my figure. “Rune was born still, a life left untethered.”
Shock and disbelief melds within me as the words resonates through the air. My gaze locks with my mother’s through the mirror and I look away, folding my hands painfully in my lap to hide the surge of emotions that are unraveling within me. I bite the inside of my cheek as I keep a calm, straight face.
I think of Rune. I think of the child who had made my childhood a living hell. I think of the man who had kissed me on the staircases. I think of the man who had filled up his book with paintings of me.
I think of a life in which he didn’t exist.
Claws slice into my palm and I wince, unfurling my fingers.
“Zephyr couldn’t take it. I was present with her, as she was my best friend. Herself and Fenrir had been trying for years. When she conceived, she named him, even before his birth. Rune, her little mystery.
“But he didn’t live, and Zephyr might have died with him if it came to it.” Mother pauses and lets out a breath, chuckling at the memory. “One moment, he had been in her arms, pale and lifeless; one moment, Zephyr had been pleading with the Goddess to do anything to save the child; one moment, I had been wrestling to get the dead child away from her. She had begun to lose her mind and Fenris had been incapable of words.
“And the next, he wheezed.”
I swallow as my mother pins my hair into intricate locks, watching her through the mirror. Her eyes are distant, caught in a memory that makes the air on my skin rise.
“But when his eyes opened, they did not belong to a child. They were pitch-black, an endless abyss that spoke of otherworldly origins. Around him, there was a dark haze that set the midwives running from the chambers.”
Mother pauses again, lips drawing tight. “The Priestess arrived shortly after, even if she hadn’t been summoned, and her message–the Goddess’s message had been clear. The Goddess had answered Zephyr’s plea, granting the child life. But in the intricate tapestry of divine intervention, another thread had been woven. The soul of Hekate, shared its vessel with that of the child. Within the confines of that singular body, two consciousnesses coexisted-one of rationality and the other, primal instinct. Hekate is to Rune what Sloan is to you.”
“They are not the same then,” I whisper.
“They are, as much as you and Sloan become one when you shift.”
My head feels too full, too heavy. Rather than press for more details, I say, “Why then were the schools built?”
Mother laughs heartily. “Why else? Because Hekate will never forgive us. Best to be prepared to fight him off when he strikes.”
She steps around my chair and stops in front of me. She leans in, placing her hands on either sides of the chair and her eyes lock with mine. “It is why this bond must be severed. Eventually, the untamed savagery and ancient power that is Hekate will take control, and there will be no Rune. Eventually, he will come for us, to collect that which he is owed. Eventually, he will have his revenge. Should he mate with you, whether or not he can help himself, you will be the first one he kills.”
Her fingers rise to touch my cheek and they are light and soft, much like her gaze. “You must do this, Astrid. I will not lose you. Do you understand?”
I nod.
***************
“As the stars themselves pale in comparison to your radiance, my princess, I beseech you to grant me the honor of your hand and the privilege of sharing a lifetime of love and devotion.”
My gaze remains impassive, devoid of emotion, an icy mask.
Disappointment creases the male’s features, and he retreats, excusing himself from my presence to join the others whom I have unabashedly disregarded.
Though my father may compel me to go through this selection, he cannot dictate the choice of a mate for me. It is mine alone to make.
Blurred and muted, the world around me becomes an indistinct haze. My mother’s words from this morning refuse to vacate my mind, their presence a persistent echo.
*”Eventually, he will have his revenge. Should he mate with you, whether or not he can help himself, you will be the first one he kills.”*
I am suddenly taken back to that day in the training hall, and my fingers rise instinctively to my neck. I can still feel those slender fingers around my neck as they had tried to squeeze the life from me.
I shiver, fingers curling as they drop in my lap. What scares me most of all is that I do not believe mother. I do not believe he can kill me. Hekate. Rune. Whichever it is. If he wanted me dead, I already would be.
Perhaps not, but mother’s words have had me thinking of a lot of things. Like Rune’s rejection.
I know. I should be worried about my own neck and how I’m supposed to get through all of this, but all I can truly consider is… what if he rejected me to keep me safe?
What if… what if Rune cares for me?
My eyes carry over the crowd of men at the foot of the diaz, looking upon me expectantly. I do not wish to be with anyone else.
Anyone that isn’t Rune.
And though, I know it is the bond speaking and making me feel these things that I absolutely hate, I cannot help the yearning I feel. The longing.