HER EVERY FANTASY

Jasmine got home and rushed out of her car, almost blinded my the tears pouring out of her eyes. She wondered if she would ever be able to get over this. Would she ever get over Collins and the loss of her child? Maybe the pain would never go away, because every time she started to feel like she was getting better, something just happened and then she was back to square one.

She shut her door and threw herself on the couch, then she let herself go. Her sobs grew louder and she let it all out. The good thing about crying was that it helped.. Somehow it helped her get rid of the bad energy and she wanted it all out. Soon her sobs turned to sniffs as she didn’t even have the energy to cry anymore.Contentt bel0ngs to N0ve/lDrâ/ma.O(r)g!

It was when she stopped crying that she realized that someone was knocking… Not loudly, but consistently. She sat up and listened to make sure that she wasn’t mistaken, but there was really someone out there knocking on her door. She wiped her eyes quickly and got up. When she got to the door and looked through the peep hole and saw Collins, she took a step back.

He stopped knocking for a while and she thought that he was leaving. She hoped he would leave. She was a mess. Her eyes would be very swollen after all that crying and her make up would be so messed up and that would make her look even worse, and she didn’t want him to see her like that. Didn’t want him to know just how much he affected her. Didn’t want to give him any more control over her life.

She gasped a little when she heard him speak.

‘Jasmine, please open up’ he said

He sounded so… Hurt. Like he was in pain just as she was.. Or maybe that was just what she wanted to hear. That was the thing with her.. When it came to him, she seemed to only hear what she wanted and really good at believing only what she wanted to believe.

‘Jasmine please’ he pleaded. ‘I know that you hate me and you have every reason to…’

Wrong, she thought. She didn’t hate him. She couldn’t.

‘…. But you don’t have to be alone in this’ he continued. ‘I know you are hurting. I am too, believe it or not, but we can be in this together. Please just open up… Please Jasmine… Just open up’

Jasmine hesitated, but he still didn’t leave so she unlocked the door and opened it. Standing face to face with him, they both stared at each other for a while before she said, ‘There was no need to follow me home, Collins. As you can see, I got home safely.’

‘Are you alright?’ he asked. ‘You have been crying’

‘I’m fine’

He didn’t look like he believed her and she didn’t blame him. No one would believe that she was okay because she clearly didn’t look alright, but she was stubborn so she wouldn’t admit it.

‘Can I come in?’

Jasmine hesitated. He looked different… He was still very handsome and attractive, but he wasn’t as sure of himself as before. Definitely less commanding and he looked like he truly cared. Like he was hurting like she was.

‘Please Jasmine’ he added when she made no effort to move away from the door.

Jasmine sighed and moved away so he could come in. When he did she shut the door and turned to face him.

Collins stared back. For so long all he had wanted was to see her and now that  he was, he didn’t know how to begin, but he had to start somewhere.

‘I’m sorry about tonight’ he said softly. ‘I didn’t mean to show up to upset you. When I told Leonard that I was in town and he invited me to join him for dinner, I wanted to decline, but when he told me that you were coming, I accepted the invite because I wanted to see you. The last thing I wanted to do was ruin dinner with your sister, and I know you I shouldn’t have followed you home, but I couldn’t go home without checking to see if you were alright.’

Jasmine sniffed. ‘It’s not your fault, Collins’ she replied, ‘Regardless of everything that has happened between us, Leonard is still your friend and you have every right to have dinner with him if you want to. I should be the one apologizing. I made a scene and yelled at Favour. I was unable to control my feelings and I ended up blaming her for things that were not her fault.’

‘ I’m sure that once you guys talk, you’ll be able to straighten things out with her. She’s your sister and you’re close to each other. I’m sure she will come to understand once you both calm down’

His words helped, she had to admit that, but him being in her apartment by this time wasn’t going to help her move on, so she decided to hit the nail on the head.

‘Why are you here, Collins?’ she asked bluntly.

He gave her an answer as straight forward as her question

‘To check on you like I said… And to see if there is a chance that you and I can straighten out our own issues’ he said, then added after a pause. ‘If you want to. I don’t want to make you do anything you don’t want to, but you are important to me and what we both had was important to me, although it took me so long to realize that, I don’t want to let you go. I want you fix things between us… If you let me, Jasmine’

‘And just how are we supposed to do that’ Jasmine asked.

He smiled and moved closer to her, and Jasmine fought the urge to take a step backwards. ‘We could start by you allowing me to take you out on a date so we can talk. I don’t know if you still have that note I sent you, but you can meet me there tomorrow. The rose garden in the botanical gardens, down from the Macquarie Street entrance. By twelve noon, I’ll be there waiting for you.’

‘I’m worried…’

‘Please Jasmine.’ he begged, reaching forward before she could move away and taking her hands in his. ‘Just meet me, and we’ll talk’