His Second Wife

Chapter 44

~Camila’s POV~

“I want you to be as strong as possible. You will hear a lot of things about me.”

I crossed my legs in an attempt to avoid what was oozing from my sex. Published by Nôv'elD/rama.Org.

“Camille, I sincerely love you. I honestly mean it. I’ve committed numerous heinous acts. I betrayed us, I betrayed our bond. I have loved you from the first time I set my eyes on you, but I fought my feelings. Each time I fought how I felt, I would end up in the hands of another. I fell short of your and Liam’s expectations. Not once, not twice, but an infinite number of times. I just want you to know that no one else is pregnant for me and there will never be anyone, except for you. I’m very sorry for the pain I’ve caused you over the months, now going to a year of our marriage. I was foolish and was averse to confessing my feelings to you. However, I’m going to tell you how I feel about you right now, not because I want to have my way with you, this has been how I felt about you, from the day we married. When you walked into this house, I knew it was going to be difficult to hide how I felt for my little wife. It is up to you to accept me as I am. However, I still want you to know how much you made me feel, how much you have broken all the walls I’ve created when it comes to love. I want you to understand how much I have loved you without realizing I was in love with you and slept with women only to run away from my feelings for you. I want you to understand how awful I felt each time I slept with someone trying to forget your sinful body, your face, your smiles, and the little touches that drive me crazy without you even trying. I have loved everything about you, Camila Grayston, and I was scared and I still am scared of how dangerous you make me feel. You are everything to me, but then I ruined everything because of the damn age difference, didn’t I? I walked into this shower naked in front of you to tell you all this. Naked in front of you, without hiding anything about me.”

I was not thinking straight; I wanted him. In spite of his imperfections, I wanted him. This is wrong, but I wanted it.

I took hold of his shaft and began rubbing it carefully. A groan escaped his lips. I knelt down. He stopped me as I was ready to suck his cock and turned off the water. He carried me bridal style and placed me in bed. Then he began drying his body and mine. I wanted to ask him why he stopped me. I want him to be a part of me, but he doesn’t want to be a part of me. I always have hopes up. I wanted him to be inside me. I was struck by a realization. This happens every time whenever we try to make progress. He’ll never see me as a woman. I am so stupid. This hurts. It hurts so much that I can’t even try to hide it.

Why am I still so hooked on him? What is it about him that still weakens my knees and compels me to make him my first?

I snatched his hands away from me. I was enraged and screamed. I lost it entirely for the first time and resorted to violence. When I got close to him, I hissed, spitted, and scratched him, just like a cat would do. I hate him. I detest him so much. I scraped his body incessantly without pausing, completely unaware of what I was doing. He had me wrapped around his arms, my wrists in his palms, and my arms crossed across his chest. I was gasping for air. He just stood there wrapping his arms around me so firmly that I couldn’t move an inch.

“I’m sorry. Can we talk about this, Camille?” What more can we talk about, what more is there to talk about? He loves me but he can’t touch me, is that even love? I am his wife, but I am in this loveless marriage.

When I registered my surroundings, he freed me. My nails were shattered and my fists hurt as a result of the punches I landed on Chris’s firm chest. My gaze shifted to his face. He was bleeding. My hands instinctively shot to my lips. I’m still reeling from what I’ve done. His hands and neck were covered with scratches. My gaze was drawn to his other hand. I bit him, and he was covered in bite marks. I took a step back, my hands clasped across my mouth.

I was in disbelief at what I had just done. I took my clothes and was about to put them back on when he grabbed them and dragged me into our bedroom. He pushed me up onto the bed and used his fingers to sweep his hair back. He remained draped in his towel. He knelt in front of me. I was sitting on the edge of the bed. He quickly rested his head on my lap. He took my hand in his.

“You are my wife, Camille, and putting my cock inside you now will only give you more suffering. Numerous things will continue to harm you. I don’t want to sleep with you today, and then we’ll start fighting the next day. Camille, I love you too much to do that to you, to us. At this point, I can’t bring myself to sleep with you, despite my desire to fuck you until you pass out. I just cannot. You are far more deserving than having sex today and fighting tomorrow. All I want you to do is look after Liam and wait for me, but if you feel you are unable to wait or if you decide to divorce me along the way, I will grant your wishes. I love you and will grant all of your wishes, but I am unable to sleep with you right now. The press will begin releasing a flood of information on me from today. I admit that I had feelings for you previously but was unable to sleep with you since I believed you were just a girl. However, at the moment, I am determined to make this work, to make us work, Mrs. Grayston. I want this Camille, you, me, and our son. It’s just not the right time yet.”

I fixed my gaze on him. I still wanted to fuck him, but I moved and tucked myself into the bedsheets, and he immediately began cleaning the blood off his body. He then removed his towel and made his way into bed, naked. I have my doubts that we will survive until morning without doing anything. Tension is thick in the air. Plus we are naked.