Chapter 188
Thea
I couldn’t explain the kind of feeling I was experiencing now because it looked like so many negative and positive emotions were mixed together and tossed into my heart.
I was angry at him, I hated him yet I was happy to see him and I desired him. My lips parted gradually as I had to breath through my mouth to save myself.
“A-Angel….” I whispered his name but I wasn’t sure he heard it because I could barely hear it. He had a mean gaze towards me and for a moment there I was worried how this encounter would end.
He wasn’t saying anything and just kept staring at me. I wanted to leave but I was scared he’d stop me. He took a step closer to me and I shuddered unexpectedly.
Why was my body acting up now that he was here? I clutched my dress again easing my tension on it but even that wasn’t enough.
I was feeling breathless.
“Did Irene not give you instructions about working here?” He finally spoke and the firmness of his voice was intimidating.
“Yes she did. Not to be seen by you. ”
I answered mustering the courage to speak but my eyes kept taking pictures of every bit of his body especially his face.
I dare to say it, deep down I knew I missed him.
” So why were you watching?” His voice was still cold.
“… And why did you come after me if seeing me annoyed you that much?” I shot back at him. I didn’t need to go soft on him now that I was before him. I saw his eye twitch, he probably didn’t expect the counter but I was glad I did because now I felt more bold to speak up.
His jaw clenched and I could tell anger was building inside him.
“I see you haven’t suffered enough to have your mouth running this way.”
I scoffed. Was he expecting to see me broken? I’d never give him that satisfaction not when I was innocent of his accusations.
“If anything, it’s given me a thick skin Angel, so feel free to keep punishing me as you wish.” I said harshly feeling anger also swirl in me. He wasn’t the only one who knew how to be angry here. He shook his head and I saw hate flash in his eyes, it hurt me to be looked at that way by the man I loved but I wouldn’t let that affect me.
“I should never have trusted you. You have no single remorse for what you did.”
What? If he was suffering then he had himself to blame because he gave me no listening ears when I tried to explain myself and he shot Carl whose crime was to help me escape Sparrow and here he was talking about remorse.
“So is this about remorse? You want me to beg you and say how sorry I am?” My voice had gotten louder and angrier but he didn’t seem fazed by it. “Guess what, I’m not sorry. The only thing I’m sorry for was falling…” I cut myself short realizing the words that were about falling from my mouth. I bit my lips hissing inwardly at myself while Angel’s eyes flashed with curiosity.
“If you think I’ll plead for you to spare me after what you did to Carl then you’re delusional.” I spat and as if my words fueled his anger more he took some angry steps towards me and I moved back till he stopped following.
“Maybe I should make you join him then if you can’t beg for your life.”
“Then do it! Do it. As long as I’m alive I’ll never beg you because you’re a monster!” I yelled and his eyes narrowed showing the hurt in them. He blinked and the hurt in his eyes faded gradually replacing with anger again.
Did he care that I called him a monster or was I reading too much meaning into it?
“You’re right, I am a monster.” He voiced hoarsely and it cut me off guard, I had not expected him to accept it. I hoped that deep down he detested it and would have a rethink about this entire thing but there he stood accepting it.
“Loving You made me forget that for a while but I’m glad you did what you did because I feel free. You were never deserving of that love.” He said rudely and turned away to leave.
His words hurt me and my eyes stung painfully with tears. I couldn’t let him get to me and I wouldn’t let him have the last say.
“And Lola deserves it?” He stopped and looked at me a bit shocked.
I wanted to ignore the topic but I was damn curious about it. I had cried my eyes out the entire night just thinking about the possibilities.
He chuckled darkly as he moved closer to me. I blinked dipping my head to avoid his gaze, did I show my vulnerability by bringing it up because he looked curious and amused at the same time.
“I’m curious, why did you mention Lola suddenly?” He tilted his head to the side squinting his eyes curiously at me. I needed to do something so I wouldn’t appear weak. “Don’t think too much about it. Of course I heard the gossips and you know, you shouldn’t marry her.” I found my mouth running faster than I wanted it to. I maintained a stern look at him refusing to look affected by it but Angel looked at me amused and I almost felt defeated.
“Why?” He asked leaning towards me with his eyes boring into mine. “Jealous? Because you’d be serving her as my wife when it happens.”
I felt my anger triple and I swear I wanted to land a slap across his face but I couldn’t bring myself to so I just glared at him and at the same time hoping the tears that pooled in my eyes didn’t trickle down.
“You wish! You and I know that you’re not in love with her. So it’s best to save her an unhappy life with being married to a man who doesn’t love her.” I fought back
“I’m impressed, you’re so confident. You think I can’t fall out of love with you? That you’re stuck in here?” He said pointing to his heart.
My heart leaped in fear at his words, what if he really could get over me? It wasn’t something I looked forward to because on my end, I couldn’t stop loving him.
My lips quiver as I still thought of his words. I wanted to say something to hurt him back as well but nothing could come out, instead I felt my throat and chest constrict in pain as I tried to hold back my tears.
I felt my belly acting up again and I let out shaky breaths to calm myself. At first I thought it was because I was hurting from his words but for real I felt like throwing up again.
Yes again! It would be so embarrassing to actually do that now but the nausea was getting worse that my body jerked as what I ate earlier went up my chest.
I quickly slapped my hands on my mouth as if that would stop me from throwing up.
“What’s Wrong?” Angel asked and to my surprise he looked worried but it confused me as to why. Didn’t he wish for me to suffer?
My eyes bulged as I felt movements up my throat almost making its way to my mouth. I couldn’t pretend or hold it down any more so I quickly ran past Angel brushing hard against him.
I went straight to the kitchen and began throwing up at the sink, tucking my hair back to avoid it falling and mixing with the spew. I knew Angel had followed me but at this point I didn’t even care. I was just focused on easing my stomach upset. I coughed what was left of my spew and even though I felt week after emptying my belly I began cleaning the sink. Thankfully I had eaten only fruits and milk so my spew was able to pass the sink hole easily. I made sure to wash the sink with liquid soap to get rid of the smell then I washed my mouth, hand and face.
“What’s wrong?” Angel finally spoke. He had been watching me in silence all the while. I held the kitchen island for support even though my body just wanted to fall to the ground. I saw Angel move toward me so I put a hand forward to stop him from getting any closer.
“Stay back!” I yelled and he stopped. I turned to look at him and the worry I saw in his eyes shifted to suspicion.
“What’s wrong with you? Why are you throwing up?”
“Its none of your business.” I said rudely.
“You’ll answer me because it is.” He yelled back startling me with how authoritative he sounded.
“Isn’t that what you want? Suffer me till I die?” I said not interested in giving him an answer.
“You are not trying to appeal to my conscience with that are you?”
I scoffed. “I could care less about your dead conscience.”
He chuckled. “Good thing you know it’s dead so if you are fucking sick it’s my damn business! You think I’d let you die before I got the chance to satiate my anger?” I squinted my eyes at him in disbelieve. Stupid me for even thinking that the expression he had earlier was genuine worry.Nôvel/Dr(a)ma.Org - Content owner.
“Why not go back to your whore and let me go back to work. Trust me I’d rather work my life away than stand here talking with you!” I yelled but he chuckled darkly.
“Even if you are at the brink of death Thea, I’ll revive you so you can go back to suffering as you desperately wish for.”
I remained silent because his words got to me, tears quickly welled up my eyes and I was unable to restrain it as a line dropped down my face.
“I hate you.” I muttered and he smirked.
“I don’t care.” He drew out his words breaking my heart even more. “You’ll get treated by Florentine and don’t even think of refusing medication because I’ll shove the meds down your throat myself.”
He said and without a second look he turned his back against me and left the kitchen. I clutched my chest the moment he walked out and tears came in floods drowning me in it.
My legs gave up strength and I fell to my knees.
Angel had stepped on me more than he should, he had hurt me beyond measures breaking me to the depths of my soul.