Chapter 48
Gwen??
“Ashton…” The words slowly left my mouth. I didn’t mean to speak. I didn’t even want to pay any attention to him, however, emotions overtook me and left me bare.
He came closer and stopped directly in front of me, his chest heaving fervently. His gaze was like broken glass shards scraping across my skin and leaving bleeding sores. I could feel the angry heat radiating from his body to show how mad he was.
Still, my treacherous hand yearned to extend and touch him. I wanted to feel him. At the same time, I longed to slap, kick and make him feel this pain I was feeling inside. Does he not see what he is doing to me? What he is doing to us! We have a chance. Yet, he was ruining it.
“You defiled me an_”
“You fucked another woman!” I shoved at his chest and stepped around him to the other side. “What is wrong with you? I try… I try so much to tolerate all the wickedness you show to me. And still you hate me! What do you want from me?” I was shaking vigorously as the tears gushed down my face like a fountain.
“You want me to go, go where? I have nowhere to go to, Ashton. I am sorry. I know I forced you into this union but it was because I had no choice. I came here out of despair, seeking for death and then I found you. I found you, Ashton. I am your mate, don’t you see it?” The words were pouring without restraint.
I haven’t told him this because I haven’t had the opportunity. I need him to grasp the weight of what he is doing to me and to know that I am nothing like HER.
“I was lied to by my own family. The goddess disgraced me before my pack members and-and right now, I don’t even know what I am.” I was saying it. I was opening myself to him, risking a chance with him. Nonetheless, I didn’t care anymore.
What was the biggest thing he could do to me, anyway? He had done everything. What was left was the emptiness, the void of nothing, and as it stands now, I don’t even know where I stand with him.
“I am wolfless, Ashton…” More tears descended. “I don’t have a family to call mine. My best friend, the one I thought was going to be my mate, fucked with my sister and my parents, the people I thought gave birth to me, turned out to have picked me from some fucken border!”
My chest hurt from the memory. It was as if a hot blade was pierced into it. I was burning deep within. My eyes does not leave his as I took him in and he did the same.
His eyes that were cold before were slowly easing to something-I can’t tell.
“That was why I came here that day. I didn’t plan to. It was a coincidence that we met and… everything happened.”
I waved my hands about, finally looking away. I sniffed and wiped my face sharply, grabbing the robe tightly about me as if for dear life.
“I know you hate me. I know you want me to accept your rejection and set you free. However, think about what I just told you. Think about your people, they need a Queen. A Queen I am willing to be. And you need an heir too. I am giving myself to you…” A ghost of a smile flickered on my face as I braved up and strut closer.
He was intently appraising me, not saying a word. I stopped in front of him and after hesitating for a while( to think my action through), I lifted my hands and copped his squared jaws into my hands. “Please, give me a chance, Ashton. I beg of you. Allow me to… love you.”
He tensed, that darkness immediately returning. As he made to change positions, I held tighter and flattened my body into him, hugging myself against him. “I forgive you for everything. I want to believe you didn’t mean to do it. Just-just don’t continue treating me like this.”
His powerful arms came to my both shoulders and held me and began ripping me off him. My hands didn’t move from around his waist. “Gwendolyn…”
“I will never do anything to hurt you…”
“Gwendolyn!”
He had me at arms length. “Stop…” He snapped, bending to look deeply into my eyes. “You sound pathetic.”
I bit down on my lips.
Was that how I looked to him now? After everything I just revealed to him? Pathetic?
“Dress up properly and come down for dinner. This madness has to stop.”Property of Nô)(velDr(a)ma.Org.
He stepped back, not breaking glance with me as he made it to the door, opened it and left.
I stood as he left me, shrouded in shame. What have I done? I am such a fool! What was I thinking? That he would suddenly change towards me? That he would stop despising me and embrace me?
Only a fool would think like that.
A pathetic desperate fool!
And do you know what pained me more? The fact that right now, it looked like a spell was expelled from my eyes and I can see better.
How can I go down to dinner after the ridiculous feat I just pulled?
I wriggled my hand on my way down, every eye, every move seeming like the world was watching and making mockery of me. Like they knew what I did.
My head was down when I entered the large room. When I managed to lift it, everyone was seated around the long table. Tyler smiled and winked at me.
I gave him a brief sad beam and hurried to sit beside Ashton, not meeting his eyes.
After an aromatic dish of peppered chicken and potato sauce was served, and everyone ate quietly till the last drop, we had desserts and flushed it down with tasty white wine.
I was thinking the suspense was over and I could escape when Ashton abruptly cleared his throat from beside me. It got my attention rapidly, having my eyes sauntering in his direction.
He looked at Tyler. “It has come to my attention that while I was away, you and my Queen was traipsing around town shamelessly without a care to what the public will think. Not to mention neglecting your duties to the pack…”
“Your ma_”
Ashton smacked his hand on the table, having the wares clinking in disturbance as his lethal vision landed on Tyler. “Don’t you ever interrupt me in your life if you care to see another day.”
Tyler bowed his head in submission to show his regret.
Ashton proceeded. “For that, I have decided you are to move out of the palace to a better dwelling that has been prepared for you as the chief of the warriors. A cottage has been made closer to the border, so as to keep you closer to your job and have the Queen concentrate on the most important things. It appears you are now very familiar with your new surroundings. She is therefore relieved from her service of taking care of you.”
“As it pleases you, my King,” Tyler consented. “I am most grateful for your hospitality towards me.”
“Good,” Ashton stood, and shared a look with me. He extended his hand to me. “Dinner is over. My Queen and I will have to retire now before the night gets old. We have duties to uphold.”
If only shame was a person.
…