My Secret, My Bully, My Mates. Series

It only took a few weeks to get enough housing done in the southern part of the pack for the agriculture omegas to move in and begin tending to the damaged lands our produce grows in. The rogues that came through here were focused on getting rid of our food supplies, not the places where wolves who grew the food lived. Nothing is growing yet, that just takes time, but the sight of cleared farmland brings hope to everyone. We also brought in pack members who had any skills in building so the projects could go faster. It's been great getting a few trucks of members arriving every week or so. We are becoming whole again, piece by piece.

We still don't have the pups here, but Gwen checked in with Kyle yesterday and said they were training hard, keeping the warriors on their toes and are ready to prove they can come home and help keep the pack safe. It made us laugh to hear some of the things that they are getting up to. I miss all of the little voices playing, yelling and just consuming the pack in their laughter. We finished the dorms first since it is the most centrally located, it's housing everyone who is working for us and we can feed and care for them more easily. It was also the most simple to build and furnish. Martha has returned to her diner which is surprisingly, still standing. She won't let any of us in yet, not even to help. She wants to wait until the 'whole pack has returned.' We just laugh at her, but no one messes with or crosses Martha. It's fun to see the pack returning to life.

After a long day of building and moving more people into their new homes I showered and changed into comfortable clothes. Waiting for my mates to get back from the jobs they have all taken on, I am just lounging in the hammock that Oliver set up for me on the beach staring out at the water. He built it big enough so I could lay out here by myself, but more importantly, with any one of them and they would fit much better than 'the tiny little one' I had in Ava's garden.

I am totally in love with this beach house. I don't think I am going to share it with anyone but my mates when everything is all said and done. It's only downside is also it's upside. It is so far from everyone else. love having the guys all to myself and the sound of the ocean in the background is perfect. It helps me feel calm when my mind starts to wander and I remember I am only seventeen, just a kid. Some of these pack members were around when I was born and now I have to help lead them and keep them safe and happy. I am supposed to help teach and guide these people, help make decisions that affect all of them, and that is a scary thought. Am I ready? Are any of us ready?

I rub my eyes. This pup thing is going to make me a little bit crazy too. I know that my friends are just giving me a hard time, but the rest of the pack members that are here just assume that since I am mated to the guys that we will start popping out kids any day now. I have had to get creative with diverting those conversations when they come up. What they don't know is my family's history with pregnancy and how really very serious and scary it is. I need to have a good long conversation with Uncle Reggie about it, but that just seems super weird. So, Elena and Gentry have been my go between with him so far which makes the conversations about pregnancy and delivery so much less awkward. It will need to happen eventually. I need to know firsthand what to expect so I can prepare. That seems to be the consensus in the women who lived through the delivery. The witches are coming up with a plan that sounds completely plausible with spells and herbs. But I haven't even had my heat yet and I hope the Moon Goddess hears me and will just let me be for a little while longer. After all the recent problems and what happened to my mom, I think Mateo is just as afraid of me having pups as my mates are. They still don't like to talk about what the first female goes through.

"What are you thinking about so hard out here, Bitty?" I heard his footsteps, but he still manages to startle me.

"Can you hear my inner thoughts

going crazy as much as my emotions?" I giggle as Oliver picks

me up and lays in the hammock with me sprawled on his chest. Exclusive © content by N(ô)ve/l/Drama.Org.

"You have a look, that's for sure, but sometimes your more intrusive thoughts reach out to me. What's up?"

I rest my stacked hands on his

chest, propping my chin on the

backs looking up at him. "I was just

thinking about how young we are and we are supposed to be responsible for all of these people. And wondering if we are ready?] leave out the part about having pups. He gets quiet for days when we talk about the risks. It has also been a huge topic with Jena and Sierra running around hormonal and showing. Any pack member

anywhere will talk about pups all day long if you let them.

"I don't know if anyone is ready for this, really. Even if you are born into it like Cam and Kota. At least they knew what the expectation was. I know I was planning on being the next Gamma, protecting the Luna and maybe, hopefully, becoming one of her best friends. I didn't plan on falling in love with her and then getting lucky enough to be one of her mates."

My breath caught. "You were in love with me before we were mates?"