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Lorenzo glances up at me as I approach, greeting me with a subtle nod before returning to his work. I slept fitfully last night without him beside me as I drifted off. Despite him leaving after I fall asleep, I find comfort in him being there until I do. I stand behind him, running my hand over his back, caressing his strong shoulders through his white cotton shirt. His muscles flex beneath my fingertips. Such a powerful, formidable man. He should frighten me, but instead he intrigues me. I can't help but wonder what it would be like to truly belong to him. To be his submissive. Wear his collar and have him own me.
"You're very distracting, sunshine." His throaty growl rolls through me, making me wet and needy for his touch.
I move around to the front of his desk and take a seat, crossing my legs and smiling when his eyes are immediately drawn to the bare skin of my thighs. "Well, it's so much fun distracting you, Sir," I purr the word, hoping it will shred his last sliver of restraint.
It has the opposite effect. His entire body tenses. A muscle in his jaw ticks, and a deep furrow appears between his eyebrows. "What did you just say?" His tone is full of aggression, and the hairs on the back of my neck bristle. "I j-just... I'm s-sorry, I was playing around."
His lip curls into a snarl. "Do you think my previous lifestyle is some kind of joke, Mia?"
"What? No! I just wondered how it would sound."
I wait for his face or his tone to soften, but neither happens. "I told you that part of my life was over. I told you nobody would ever be that for me again."
"I know. I was just reading about it and ..." I shake my head. I'm not sure what I expected to happen, but it certainly wasn't this.
He plants his hands flat on the desk. "To call me Sir is a privilege that no one will ever earn again. Nobody. Not even you. This thing between us-whatever you think it is-will end soon. You know that, right?"
My lower lip trembles, but I refuse to cry.
"Am I making myself clear?" he barks.
I stand. My throat swells with emotion, but I swallow it down and look him in the eyes. "Crystal." Spinning on my heel, I march out of the room.
I don't look back, and he doesn't ask me to stay. Just like that, I know exactly what the next stage of my life must be.
***
A few hours later, and after some research, I find Kat and Dante in the den with the TV on. She's curled up against him and he has an arm wrapped protectively around her. Smiling, I watch them for a few seconds. They're so happy and in love. Surely that's out there for me somewhere, right?
"Are you okay, Mia?" Kat asks when she notices me in the doorway.
"Yeah, I just wanted to talk to you both about something. But if it's a bad time-"
"No not at all," Kat says, her tone laced with concern. Dante switches off the TV and they both stare at me as I take a seat in the armchair opposite the sofa.
I take a deep breath. "I think it's time for me to leave."
"What? No!" Kat protests, as I knew she would.
"Yes. I've loved being here and getting to spend time with you all, but I'm ready to start the next part of my life. Seeing you and Dante so happy and in love makes me want that for me. And I need to branch out on my own if I'm ever going to have the chance to."
Kat glances at her husband who shrugs in response. How can either of them argue with what I just said? "But where will you go? Brad will find you."
"That's where I was hoping you could help me." I gesture awkwardly at Dante. "You can get me a fake identity, right? Let me start somewhere new as a different person?"
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"Of course," he replies with an assured nod. "It would take a few days."
"But Mia ..." Kat makes a sad face.
"I have to do this, Kat. I'll miss you like hell, but I can't stay here forever. I need to go or I might never want to leave." I laugh, making a joke of that even though it's true. Dante regards me warily, and I pray that he doesn't push me for more details.
"Is this about Lorenzo?" Of course Kat's the one to ask that.
"This is about me needing to live my life," I tell her, avoiding any mention of her brother-in-law's part in my decision.
"You've always been a free spirit, Mia Melon," she says with a sad smile.
Tears clog my throat and I cough to clear it. "I'll always be just a phone call away."
"You have anywhere in particular you'd like to go or anyone you'd like to be?" Dante asks.
"If possible, I'd like to be a few hours' drive from Chicago. I found a few jobs in Iowa. But if you can just get me the ID, I can take care of the rest. I'm pretty resourceful when I need to be."
Dante promises me that he'll have everything by the end of the week. Kat gets up and pulls me into her arms. Embracing my cousin, I'm overwhelmed by loneliness, and a sob wells in my throat. Am I doing the right thing here? I remember Lorenzo's harsh words, how he's been pulling back from me. Yes, this is the right choice. I need to get away from him before he breaks me completely.